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Welcome to Nancy
Lem is a clitoral suction toy that uses gentle air pulses instead of vibration. It's different from anything you've tried, and this guide will show you exactly how to use it, step by step.
Lem Clitoral Massager
Your zesty new friend, perfect for your first time with air suction bliss.
Before we get into the how…
Written by the Hello Nancy editorial teamMedically reviewed by Dr. Angela Wright, GP & Clinical SexologistLast updated
Lem doesn't vibrate. It uses air pulse technology to create something completely different. Think of it as gentle, focused waves of pleasure that build and build.
On the lowest setting, it feels like tiny, feathery kisses, light and teasing, perfect for warming up.
As you increase intensity, the pulses deepen into rolling waves that build and build. Most people find their sweet spot between levels 2 to 6.
Higher levels deliver powerful, focused stimulation. Many describe the finish as deeper and more full-body than traditional vibrators.
The science
The narrow end of Lem has a small nozzle opening. When you place it over your clitoris and turn it on, it creates a sealed chamber where gentle air pulses stimulate the area without direct contact. As you increase the intensity, the pulses get stronger.
The key? Getting a good seal. That's what this guide is all about, helping you nail the positioning so you can actually feel what all the fuss is about.
Step by step
Whether this is your first suction toy or you just got a Lem, these four steps will get you from unboxing to “oh wow” in no time.
Before you even turn Lem on, take a moment to get familiar with your anatomy. Your clitoris is the small, sensitive spot at the top of your vulva, just under the clitoral hood. That's where Lem's nozzle needs to go. Understanding where it is makes positioning so much easier and helps you get the most out of every session.
Tip: Find a comfortable, private spot first. Relax, take a breath, and use a mirror if it helps. There's no rush.
Pop a small drop of water-based lube around the rim of Lem's nozzle. You can also add a little directly to yourself. It helps create a better seal and makes everything feel smoother and more comfortable from the very first moment.
Tip: Stick with water-based lube, it's gentle on Lem's silicone and on you. A tiny drop is all you need.
Gently part your labia and place Lem's nozzle right over your clitoris, the small, sensitive spot at the top of your vulva. You want the opening to surround it completely. Don't push, just rest it there gently. When you feel a light suction forming, you've got it.
Tip: Using your fingers to gently spread things first makes positioning way easier, especially your first time. Take your time here, this step makes all the difference.
Start with Level 1, the gentlest setting. Stay here for at least 60 seconds. Seriously. Your body needs a moment to warm up and respond. Resist the urge to crank it up right away. The build-up is part of the magic.
Tip: Most people end up loving something between Level 2 to 6. But Level 1 for the first minute? Non-negotiable.
Wait, there's more
Once you've mastered how to use your clitoral suction toy, these advanced techniques will help you discover what feels best. Every body is different, swipe through and experiment with these suction vibrator tips.
1Find new angles you didn't know existed
While keeping the nozzle on your clitoris, gently tilt Lem up and down. Tiny movements change the angle of the air pulses, and sometimes a small shift is all it takes to find a whole new level of sensation.
2A wave-like rhythm that builds
Rock Lem gently side to side while it's sealed. This creates a rolling, wave-like sensation as the suction shifts across different parts of your clitoris. Think of it like a slow dance.
3Tease the whole area
Make tiny circular motions while keeping the seal. This stimulates everything around your clitoris in a continuous, flowing pattern. Many people say this one sneaks up on them in the best way.
4When you want something softer
Lift Lem just barely above the skin, 1-2mm. The air pulses become lighter and more diffused. This is great for when direct contact feels too intense, or when you want a slower, teasing build-up.
5A gentler, more diffused sensation
Place Lem right on top of thin underwear, over where your clitoris is underneath. The fabric softens the sensation — great for warming up or if you're sensitive.
6You're in control
Press a little firmer for a tighter seal and stronger suction. Ease off for something lighter and more teasing. The amount of pressure you use changes the whole experience.
7For when you want to make it last
Build up until you're close... then pull Lem away or drop the intensity. Wait a moment. Start again. Each wave builds higher than the last. This one takes patience, but the payoff? Worth it.
8It's not just for one place
Try the nozzle on your nipples for a completely different sensation. Or explore your inner thighs, lower belly, anywhere that's sensitive. The air-pulse technology feels unique on different parts of your body.
Watch it work
Everything you need to know about your Lem, from care tips to getting the most out of every session.